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In the West, we are a very individualistic society. Especially within personal development, we’re all about independence, achievement, personal happiness, etc.
As human beings we are meant for more than just taking care of ourselves. That is only the basic level. There is limited growth if it’s just all about us and what we can do for ourselves and what we want and need in our lives.
When we elevate our personal growth from outside ourselves we move from surviving to thriving. And even then it is our contributory nature that allows not only ourselves and others to survive.
Just like Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs pyramid, our own needs are at the very bottom. They are the most important, yes, our physical and mental health should be our top priority, but they are also just the requirements or the prerequisites to truly living life the fullest.
When we move up to and grow to giving and serving and contribution and love, we transcend into “self-actualization” or enlightenment. With that, our energy becomes at a higher purer level.
We gain purpose and meaning by focusing on what we can give and not on what we can take. What we receive becomes a byproduct. When we focus on contributing, we become something greater than ourselves. What we do and our impact becomes limitless. This is just one of the many benefits.
I want to propose a new direction and approach in your personal growth when it comes to achievement, goals, handling problems, and overcoming obstacles and adversity.
A different approach to personal development with questions
Let’s consider asking ourselves different questions by flipping the switch on perspective.
When we switch up a question from me, me, me in terms of our growth to it gives us a fresh new perspective, gives us more potential solutions, allows for more fulfillment, greater benefits and changes everything.
Here are some examples of questions we ask ourselves that we can revamp
How can my partner love me more?
Instead ask: How can I become a better partner and give more value in the relationship
How can I make more money?
Instead ask: How can I serve more and give more value? How can I solve someone else’s problem?
How can I learn more how to do this?
Instead ask: How can I teach others? (studies show you do learn better this way)
How can I motivate and inspire myself?
Instead ask: How can I motivate and inspire others?
How can I love myself more?
Instead ask: How can I give out and spread more love?
How can I be less lonely and make friends?
Instead ask: How can I make others less lonely and be a friend for them?
We can flip the switch and gain fresh new perspectives on how to tackle our goals and problems.
This is not to say that we should ignore our own needs and wants and goals, as we can integrate both caring for ourselves and focusing on giving back and contributing, but it focuses on how can we use the natural laws of order in our personal development and growth strategy.
This is shown time and time again with different phrases, saying, ways of life, and laws:
- What you put out-You get back
- What goes up-Comes down
- Physics – Newton’s third law: for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction
- Law of Attraction
In essence, everything is energy. What we do, we feel.
When we are angry with someone, we feel that anger. When we hate someone, we feel the hate. When we love someone, we feel that love. When we give, we feel that. We are the one experiencing what we put out. We reap what we sow.
It’s time to change our approach to personal development and growth.